I've known my friend in Tulsa for a long time; we were friends way the hell back in High School. That makes it a little over eight years. I've watched him go from a solid believer to a drunk and a drug user to an abusive, lying prick. Right now, he's walking out of a relationship on a second friend of mine. I would call it a troubled relationship, but he is the only one causing trouble as far as I can tell. He's done what he's doing before, and left me to pick up the pieces of a friend. His behavior is that of a drug-addicted, drunken user of women and friends. Sometimes I feel that if I'd done more while he was closer, maybe I could have persuaded him to act differently. I told him a long time ago that I wouldn't give up on him, but now I'm sorely tempted. He's putting me through an emotional minefield, and he's done it before. He makes my life harder than it should be. He has women hanging all over him, and damn near destroyed two of them I'm proud to call friends.
That brings me to my question: How the hell does that work; why do they cling to him? He puts nothing but vice, lies, and emotional extortion into his relationships, and a woman is always there to take him in and love him. I try virtue and honesty. I know I'm a monster, but is my monstrosity that profound?
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If Jacob is renamed Israel for Struggles with God, perhaps I should only be whispered for struggles with words.
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2 comments:
Of course it is; would we have it any other way? Look at your friends, now. You've obviously gone back to speaking with me over them. It's a shame; you were so young once.
For me, it was self esteem issues.
You can't do any better. You're too fat. Just accept it. You can change him, you just have to try harder.
As much as she and I do not like each other, it's hard to know that he's putting some one else through the same shit he did to me.
I too told you not to give up on him, and now I'm wondering if I was wrong to tell you that. Right now you're being drained. You have enough burdens without handling this one.
You cannot claim the responsibility for this Thomas. I've learned that wanting to save someone isn't always enough. You can throw them the life saver, but they have to have the desire to grab it themselves.
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